This post was brought to you by a late afternoon glass of pinot grigio on the NE Regional Amtrak from DC to New York.
The trip. Is over. I’m long off the European time zone, blowing my chances at being a morning person, yet again.
People ask how it went, and I panic. Where do I start? The highlights or the lowlights? Wild swimming in England felt like 12 years ago. Allegedly we went to Albania. Each place deserves a better story.
A full recap is too daunting, so I’m tearing the trip into bite-sized chunks. Those chunks will be divided into superlatives. For whimsy.
Most surprising delight: Vabali, Berlin
Berlin is what people say it is. Artistic, cold, clean, full of bicycles and trains. We spent about a week there, in part so I could learn about its storied nightlife for an article.
We also had time to see some Very Cool Friends who live there, and over dinner they told us that we had to go to a spa called Vabali, described on its website as a “Balinese wellness oasis in the middle of Berlin.”
I was skeptical. Didn’t we have to catch up on “German” things during our stay? A Southeast Asian spa felt like cheating. But these were, objectively, the coolest people we’ve ever met. We had to investigate.
Reader, it was glorious. Like if Miyazaki designed a Japanese/Indonesian onsen with a deeply elegant and cozy library. Day passes start at $57 on weekdays, and includes access to the 10 different saunas, 3 steam baths, 4 pools, nap lounges, a very good restaurant, among other amenities. Phones and photos are not allowed inside.
We sweat and swam and ate and lounged in robes ($6 each to rent) on velvet chaise longues. In the “wet” areas, swimsuits and other clothing are forbidden, and it’s not divided by gender. Very German! It felt like a challenge: can a self-conscious American, born into a culture that teaches women to hate their bodies, forget her insecurities long enough to go full buck in a sea of svelte Europeans? In a co-ed locker room I found out that yes, I could. It felt healing to let go. Plus, the setting was divine.
We only meant to spend two hours there, but 6 later, it was painful to leave.
Other Berlin meal highlights:
Material wine bar (where I loved the carafe above)
Al Faisal Grills und Restaurant, a late-night savior
Trio contemporary German bistro
Best wedding: Cam & Mich’s
Okay, maybe it was the only wedding we attended on the trip. But it was so fun and sweet and special, it’s worth a mention. Congratulations again to the beautiful couple!!!!!!!! The inspiration for this entire trip.
Most idyllic fever dream: a day trip to Hvar
Split, Croatia is an oft-bucket-listed city on the Dalmatian Coast that does, truly, have some incredible architecture and history. But its old town has been Tulumified and Las Vegas’d to the point that I would never recommend it. In the summer at least, its jaw-droppingly magical stone passageways are clogged with swarms of group tours, and sloppy bachelor and bachelorette parties, singing drunk at the top of their lungs, bopping between mediocre bars and restaurants.
When the crowds disperse and you find a moment of calm, you can appreciate the beauty. Then you turn a corner and run into a rubber duck chain store (a phenomenon that has been popping up in tourist cities — the new fish pedicure spas, I guess).
I was crestfallen when we walked from the train station to our hotel. This — this! — was how I was introducing Dan to Croatia. This waterfront tragedy that smelled like rotting garbage.
There was a silver lining: Split is a fantastic ferry hub. The next morning, we walked to the ferry terminal and bought two tickets ($50, total) for the nearby island of Hvar. It’s an hour and a half ride, and wasn’t too choppy on our sunny day of passage.
When we stepped off the ferry, my dopamine skyrocketed.
Hvar is not off the beaten path. It’s a well-known island, but it has no “Game of Thrones” filming location fame and is just far enough to keep many potential visitors away. It’s the Croatia you envision when you dream of a Croatian summer — the Croatia I remembered from my trip more than a decade ago. Windex clear water, so clear it looks like the boats are floating in air. A picturesque clock tower sits behind a rocky beach near the marina. This was it.
We rented a scooter with a tiny engine for $60, the day rate, which felt steep considering we only needed it for a half-day. But we had no time to haggle. Our ferry back to Split was around 8 pm and it was already after noon.
The rental staff warned us against going to a restaurant I’d found on Google Maps; the road was too steep for a 50cc hog carrying two milk-fed adults. So we pivoted, and I clung to Dan from the back of the bike and directed him to a beach, like a helpful marsupial. Koala Magellan.
The first beach wasn’t quite right, so we kept going until we found signs for Zarace, another option our scooter rental guy recommended. It looked like a short but dramatic hike downward to the beach and restaurant, so we parked at the top of the cliff, knowing full well there was no way the scooter could haul us back up.
And then we were there. Paradise. Not “White Lotus” paradise, with butlers and silk-white sand. Paradise as in a little beach with a few people, a few sailboats bobbing in the protected cove where we could swim in salty water.
We set up our towels on the pebbles in the only fraction of shade we could find, and tip toed into heaven. I wanted to soak the moment into my cells and keep it forever.
Better yet, there was Gego Restaurant, a mom and pop overlooking the beach. We splurged on an $85 lunch of Aperol spritzes, mussels, seafood pasta, house white wine served with ice cubes, espressos, tiramisu to share. I bummed a Parliament from the table next to us. And then we went back to swim and nap.
As a storm cloud formed over the beach, we packed up and went back to the scooter, back to the ferry, back to Split.
We ate a cheap, easy ćevapi dinner (loosely, a Slavic take on a gyro or pita, with little sausages stuffed into bread) outside of Split old town, which felt better than fueling one of the tourist traps. And even with the Split bookends, it was a perfect day.
Friends who know Croatia better than me say you can have an even better time on nearby islands like Vis, Korcula and Mljet. I hope to investigate those claims someday.
Stay tuned for the next Big Trip™ installations, including: Saddest meal; Most essential purchase; Hotel that was so great we stayed longer; Other hotel that was so great we stayed longer; Most obvious best activity; Worst return on [effort] investment; Most stressful moment of the trip; Best use of free will.
We went on an organized bike trip through the Dalmatian islands last September - bummed out by crowds, prices, and food in Split and Dubrovnik - but l swam at the most incredible beaches every single day (including Danče outside of Old Town Dubrovnik). Best dang swimming of my life!